Paul Attinello

Author: paulattinello

  • Gifts

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    by

    paulattinello
    in ,

    Again, in Zürich/Küsnacht at the Jung-Institut, I keep intermittently experiencing myself as bitter, irritable, critical, unfair. Sigh. It's hard to disentangle or clarify this… as always. It doesn't feel as though it's all quite so maddening this time, though – and, also as usual, a number of people obviously experience me as pleasant, fun, even kindly…

  • Packing

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    paulattinello
    in

    … no, not *that* kind. I'm off to Zürich in an hour – the Jung-Institut, seminars, and my first series of exams. The weather is very warm there at the moment – entirely unlike here; trying to pack a variety of things, of course. Do you remember Sunday Bloody Sunday? Peter Finch and the incredible…

  • Changes and recoveries

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    paulattinello
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    A remarkable analysis session today… after feeling stuck for some weeks, rapid inner change and reflection. I walked away thinking of fun house mirrors – how one inevitably looks at oneself and the world through all kinds of distortions; and the power of analysis is the increasing ability to sense the distortions, to become easily…

  • Late; sleepy

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    paulattinello
    in

    As we veer away from the full moon… and the weather returns to the dim gray rainy quality it's had so much for the past weeks. A sense of impending complication, entanglement, or loss; of ventures foundering, of things not going… well, as planned. As though the entire idea of planning things, of trying to…

  • An unfinished fairy tale…

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    paulattinello
    in ,

    [My analyst told me about a brilliant exercise they did at the Jung-Institut in the 1980s – something we should do again, I think: write a fairy tale. I started this one last fall: it aims for some sort of journey or change… I haven't written more on this one; I may put it aside…

  • Learning and insight

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    paulattinello
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    Another day of reading, study, writing – broken up by lunch with a pleasant guy who is recently diagnosed HIV+, who wanted to talk about what he is going through, plus our normal HIV patient presentation to the medical students. Much study and writing is relatively continuous, work-like… but sometimes it is like a light…

  • With all due speed

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    paulattinello
    in

    Today I took the Metro out to Tynemouth with Michael, to have lunch, then see Andrew and Ingrid where they were selling prints at the Tynemouth Metro station. This station has a market every Sunday – with book markets four or five times a year in the summer months. It was only a regular market…

  • Light

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    paulattinello
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    Is it Vermeer, or perhaps Caravaggio, who is called the best painter of faces glowing from candlelight?… Candles are rarely used at night these days… but as I walk across the darkened apartment on a moonless night, an iPad shines up, showing me the way, illuminating the room. And Montaigne is on the page facing…

  • Dislocation

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    paulattinello
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    I have had about a day and a half of being really enraged – by an e-mail that felt like a dismissive insult, and from someone that matters to me… and at the same time still getting work done: finishing off that paper on figures of death and transcendence. Today we met for our usual…

  • Six years; and recent weeks

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    paulattinello
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    Blog Anniversary: since 14 May 2006. It is now six years…. How different life is now than it was then: yes, still in Newcastle, same job, same apartment, still living alone. But the inner world, and my memories, expectations, hopes, feel so different… I suppose I feel more… I don't know. More aware of the…