Author: paulattinello
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Anniversary, again
The eleven-year anniversary of this blog…. Well, hey, it matters to me. A bit. ••• After a brief but unpleasant virus – probably caught on that hasty train south and back – everything has a slightly disconnected feel to it: still coughing occasionally, but so what?… work to do, but really, who needs it?… Shower,…
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Shift
A dream fragment: One of two simultaneous dream narratives, partly remembered – don't remember the other one. A friend and I are at the front door of a house, a porch light over the door; an old woman is inside. We come to talk to her, twice – I know she won’t remember or understand…
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Easter week
Maundy Thursday. In the night I wake coughing – side effects I think, but perhaps I also caught a minor cold on the train back on Wednesday. Paracodeine (given to me by Antonio, a couple of years ago – I had the flu in Zürich, missed most of the classes that month; on the last day Antonio, who is…
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Closing doors
So: in a burst of extraordinarily blinkered and sociopolitically aggressive pettiness, the UK government pulls us out of the EU. I've been joking for months that I have two passports, but unfortunately they're the ones nobody wants… but just try to trade them for something more respectable, better. Slovenia? Great, flat trade, or shall I give…
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Pornopolitical
I keep noticing that, over the past few months, I post more pictures of hot guys on Facebook. I am more frank about commenting on attractive men, including plausibly non-gay ones. I am blunter, and more direct… On the one hand, yes, I'm thinking about not being alone, and trying to reconnect with some expectations of…
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Temporal
Perhaps the problem is one of time… Yes, I am influenced by finally (i.e., at a later point in time than anticipated within the implied framework of some unspecified but apparently familiar system of planning) seeing Arrival. But also wandering through spaces of analysis, self-reflection, mild illness, trying to get some writing done. Late, of course. Time…
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Shafts of light
From the chilly, detached sadness of last week, unexpected changes – a day and a bit that were more entwined with the life, and lives, around me – Friday, an official reception – you know the drill: speeches, food, suits, paintings for sale. But this one has much more life in it than most: an LGBT History…
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Everyday Life in the Later Roman Empire
If you think about it all: rot, chaos, aggression. Disintegration. But my desk remains, my job remains, my friends and colleagues remain… I buy food, talk to students, plan trips. There are no problems. To be honest, there have been some fairly disastrous periods even during my lifetime when one couldn't depend on governments for simple…
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Summa
A dramatic year… One that stank for the world, of course: major moves into aggressive idiocy. But it's not very interesting to talk about Brexit and the UK, Trump and America. Or about dead celebrities – some good people are gone, yes, but that happens always. And many of them were old enough that grieving doesn't seem…
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Sketch of a conversation
… You didn't really think you were having strokes, did you. Well, if memory – no, I suppose not; there would be other symptoms? Yes, there would. So: dissociation. But more dissociation than I should expect, yes? That sense over the last few months, from the last year – more connected, more of myself aware of…
Paul Attinello 