Author: paulattinello
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Another life
After working on the paper in fits and starts all day – the starts are quite productive but short, the fits just useless time-wasting – and going through lists and lists of Simpsons and Buffy shows… I think about LA and wonder, if things had gone differently, if I might have fallen into another life…
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Loot
Pleasant birthday lunch with friends – a bit quiet for some reason (which is odd for our bunch, we usually all chatter like magpies), but everyone seemed in a good mood, just less talkative than usual. Much loot. Felt pretty much like a twelve-year-old on Christmas morning – ooh look chocolates from A., Lush bath…
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50
This is it… 3 am Eastern Standard time, which is 8 am here. Huh. Well, I’m having neither the "it’s only a number" (i.e. it doesn’t matter) nor any miserable "oh no I’m old" feelings. Best articulated as: Boy, am I fifty. (I do remember telling my mother, when she turned fifty and was clearly…
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Monk!
Meredith, I mean. Although I have complained several times about the presentation I’m doing in half an hour – silly timing to do any presentation at all, thrown together out of scraps of previous work, doesn’t even fit the Theme Word of the seminar (which they picked after I volunteered, thanks much) – the truth…
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Exaltation
Perhaps (he said cautiously, looking around to make sure nothing was about to fall on his head) nothing bad will happen around this birthday at all. It doesn’t always; it’s just something I keep as a reassurance in reserve for the Bad Birthdays – which, for me, mostly mean the ones where nothing happens, where…
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Strength
On the other hand… The past few posts have been very much about reflecting broadly on my life – as I frequently do anyway (sorry if that gets boring, but there you are). It all makes sense in a context of turning fifty – yet another real turn in my life, from the chaotic turn…
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Taking a meeting
Today I chaired a meeting; it went well enough, as several of the meetings I’ve chaired over the past year. The interesting bits, though – and it’s not the first time I’ve noticed them, but they seemed exceptionally present today – were the moments when I had a relatively smooth, helpful, mature relationship with everyone…
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The Idiot
I have, unfortunately, volunteered to do a presentation on Friday on some materials and a paper I’ve written on Meredith Monk – foolishly, insanely foolishly, given that I must finish the Buffy article for presentation in Liverpool Tuesday, given that part of Saturday is lost to a birthday lunch, given that it was entirely and…
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… sleepy… [and] *click*
Sleepy today. Since in addition to problems with HIV and its medication and HCV, I also have an auto-immune thyroid problem, I’ve been taking medicines for a while now – one year, two years? – that keep my weakened thyroid from allowing me to sleep all the time. Unfortunately, I’ve been a bit careless about…
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Conversations
I neglected to mention the best part about the past week: two sets of casual conversations with wonderful, calm, sensible friends – neither of whom unfortunately live anywhere near me. Such a valuable thing, really the most wonderful thing, and something I miss a great deal: in Hong Kong, Australia, and northern England (that is…
Paul Attinello 