Category: Death
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Mom died on Sunday, very early in the morning. There have been papers to sign; my sister and brother have of course handled lion's shares of the complex work involved – contacting relatives, banks and newspapers, filling out forms, cleaning out her room, etc. I'm apologetic to say that I mostly feel a certain dim…
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Responsorial
Intermittently, over the past couple of years, I hear of the severe illness, loss of mental control, or death of a contemporary – not from HIV or related problems, but from, well, anything else, as it happens. As I am now in my mid-50s, this is becoming more and more a normal occurrence. Unfortunately, at…
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Globes
Working tonight on a program note for an old piece of mine – as it happens the final composition I ever wrote, in 1986 – Seven Last Haiku, which will have its premiere by the students in late March this year. One or two pianists are looking at it, and we have a cellist (Bennett…
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The dull world
So: the news from the doctor – the medication doesn't seem to be doing much; a final decision in another month or so, but probably this was all useless. Which was kind of expected anyway. Annoyingly, since early December, and more so since Christmas Day (which was, itself, fun, at Michael and Andrew's), I am…
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Dying / not-dying
Feeling well today. Then feeling very tired, so went and laid down. Then well again. And talking to Alfred, who has more success and fame than I ever will, and who is thirteen years older. After having been treated yesterday by Jambo, my acupuncturist, who is twenty-eight, full of life and presence and direction. I…
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For Vanessa: Reflections on Rubinstein
[A memorial concert was held for Vanessa Knights last Saturday, May 3, a bit more than thirteen months after her death at the age of 38. I gave the following speech, which includes excerpts from a book first published in 1985 and translated in 1989.] If you’ll allow me, I’m going to tell you about…
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Foolish scientists
Last month, when I was reading a lot of science fiction writer Greg Egan (in between visits to V. in the hospital), I was getting caught up in his characters – and not always agreeably: as Egan has a lot of interest in ‘hard’ science, his people tend to disdain the humanities, religion, emotion, and…
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The Expert
Today I returned V.’s library books to the university library; chased by a student who wanted to chat, I just pulled away and said it was a difficult day. Difficult especially because one of our first-year students committed suicide last night; a sweet kid, one who had had problems with depression and anxiety, but who…
Paul Attinello 