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Dying / not-dying
Feeling well today. Then feeling very tired, so went and laid down. Then well again. And talking to Alfred, who has more success and fame than I ever will, and who is thirteen years older. After having been treated yesterday by Jambo, my acupuncturist, who is twenty-eight, full of life and presence and direction. I…
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What Happened
I should probably try to put down the details of the stroke, before I lose track of them completely… they are in any case fragments, as I don't remember everything, and it was all fairly disjunct, bizarre, surreal… and unfortunately now some time ago. Thursday night, June 18, 2009 – just about a day after…
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Alternative histories
Last night's dream: a music conservatory, walking between buildings in rainy autumn weather – I am a student working on my technique, talking with others – serious, committed and reasonable, as I never actually was in school… a surprisingly detailed, and strange, setting. Like another life, one that might have happened. Today I was working,…
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A good day
Despite my pathetic worries, and Kit's critique, Gay Pride in Newcastle was pleasant, and it was good to see everyone. My energy faded to nothing after about an hour and a half, but I expected that; and so went home, having greeted and hugged a number of people, picked up a few pamphlets and whistles,…
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All summer in a day
The symptoms remain a bit strange, and it's strange how they come and go: why would I be so tired after a stroke? It's not as though it involved any work. Just shaved and showered; it was almost all I could manage, and I'm shaking from the effort of standing, of focusing on using my…
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Adorno’s Dreams
After last night's brave and admittedly somewhat demented post – not that I discount its ideas and feelings: I think I really could crack my behavior, my limitations, open, if I had the energy and courage, which I may yet be able to find – I put myself together today to go to the pharmacy…
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Paul Attinello 